


Toasters and Dragons

by EffieTrinket1619



Series: Helping and Healing [2]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Broken Limbs, Burns, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Patton is a concerned dad, Roman you reckless child, Virgil is a disaster gay, a toaster is harmed, dragon - Freeform, logan is Done
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-24
Updated: 2019-05-24
Packaged: 2020-03-13 15:06:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,298
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18943411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EffieTrinket1619/pseuds/EffieTrinket1619
Summary: Sometimes, Roman liked to drag his friends on quests. Sometimes, they didn't go according to plan.





	Toasters and Dragons

**Author's Note:**

> SO!  
> I asked a friend to give me a prompt off the top of her head and she came up with:  
> 'prinxiety hurt/comfort involving a toaster'  
> So here we are.

“What _is_ it, Princey?”

Virgil, being the catastrophe he was, was lying upside down on the couch, purple hair brushing the floor like a complete _heathen._ Roman shook his head in utter exasperation and sighed.

_Why couldn’t I get a normal family?_

Roman grabbed the hand that was hanging freely and touching the floor and pulled at it. With a strangled yelp, Virgil tumbled off the couch in a heap. Hissing like a cat, he righted himself and turned around quicker than should’ve been humanely possible and _leapt_ at Roman. They were dragged down in a tangle of limbs.

 _“Virgil you idiot!”_ Roman shrieked, his voice reached an octave that was painful to his own ears. Virgil tried to sit up, but lost his balance, ultimately falling back down and slamming into Roman.

This time, they stayed on the ground, Virgil too lazy to get up and Roman too prideful.

“Ugh.”

A minute passed in silence, where Roman’s leg started to fall asleep.

“What happens now, then?” he asked.

Virgil sighed. “Either Pat comes in and starts with the Dad Jokes, or Logan comes and starts yelling at us.”

“We deserve it either way,” Roman deadpanned.

Another minute passed between them. Roman couldn’t feel his leg now.

“What did you want in the first place anyway, Sir Sing-A-Lot?”

Roman immediately perked up. “I was _going_ to ask you if you would like to accompany me on a quest,” he stated with a grin. Virgil rolled his eyes.

“Right. And why did you want me to come?”

Roman huffed a little. “A prince needs his knight!” He lowered his voice a little. “Please,” he muttered, looking at Virgil with Those Eyes.

Virgil sighed a little. “I can’t say no to a face like that.”

His face brightened immediately, and Virgil found his lips curl up.

“Hey. Why were you sitting like that in the first place?”

“I’m a disaster gay.”

 

They were trekking through a made-up forest Roman had conjured up in half a second. Despite it being thought up on the fly, it was intricately detailed, from the dappled sunlight streaming through the canopy of trees, to the different kinds of green that were on display, from the light yellowish colour of a new leaf in sunlight, to the dark glossiness of a leaf in the undergrowth. Dead leaves, in varying stages of decay, crunched under their feet. Somewhere off in the distance, Virgil could hear running water in the silence, and the occasional bird song.

He was almost suspicious of the calm, treading lightly on his feet and keeping a sharp lookout for anything that might be a threat. The last thing he needed was a jump-scare.

“So what’s on the agenda, Princey?” Virgil asked, looking around apprehensively.

“We’re to go to a cave in these woods. In that cave is the Felicis Sapphire, guarded by a ferocious dragon! We must retrieve the jewel and survive the dragon and make it out with our bodies and minds intact!” Roman’s narration was complete with wild arm flailing and waving his sword in the air at the mention of a dragon.

Virgil smiled and shook his head. “You made that up on the spot, didn’t you?”

Roman looked sheepish. “Er…maybe,” he said. “But the quest is set up properly! It will be fun and dangerous and aesthetic as all hell! I am, after all, the flamboyant gay!” Roman winked and took Virgil’s hand in his own, walking off in a brisker manner. Virgil tripped up a couple of times but didn’t complain.

“Hey Roman. What’s the plan?” he asked nervously. God, they were dealing with a dragon, and knowing Roman’s slight obsession with Game of Thrones, it was going to be big. And dangerous.

“Simple. I’ll distract it, you get the gem, and then we both get out!”

“That easy, Princey?” Roman caught the worry in Virgil’s voice and stopped.

“You don’t need to do this if you don’t want to Virgil. We can opt for something less distressing.” It wasn’t a jab at him, just an honest statement. He was looking out for him. The knot in Virgil’s chest loosened.

“No stupid stunts?”

“I make no promises. But we will be fine though, Virgil. Trust me.”

Oh how wrong they were.

 

The cave materialised in front of them, the entrance looming over them as the thick fog rolled out. Orange light streaked the dark, stone walls. They glittered with jewels embedded in them, sparkling blue, green, purple and red.

“Roman, I don’t think gems work like this.”

“Shut up, and let me have my fun,” Roman hissed back, holding his sword up in front of him defensively and edging closer to the light source.

“Kay.”

The entrance tunnel steadily got wider and the air around became hotter (to the point where Virgil took off his jacket and tied it around his waist) until they finally reached the belly of the cave, a room that seemed to stretch on and on in the other direction. The light was coming from a pool of magma set into the ground, which took up a generous amount of space in the middle. It bubbled and hissed, the colours constantly shifting from orange, to crimson, to yellow and back to red. Over on the other side of it, Virgil could see a large, indistinct shape, almost _glowing_ purple.

Roman tapped Virgil’s shoulder to get his attention. _That’s the dragon,_ he mouthed. Virgil nodded.

_Where’s the gem?_

Roman grinned viciously. _Under. I’ll go poke the dragon, be right back._

Before Virgil had time to register how incredibly _stupid_ Roman’s declaration was, he was already running off in the other direction. So he stood there, frozen in shock, as the bitch poked a goddamn dragon with a pointy stick.

A roar filled the air, and shook the walls, rattling Virgil’s bones. His blood curdled, and he suddenly felt very, very small.

Roman let out a shout that _sounded_ happy, because Roman was definitely crazy, and bounded around the lava pit, motioning at Virgil to go the other way. He set out, trying to drown out the bellows of the dragon and set his own little course. As he got closer, he could see something glowing blue, and he picked up the pace. Virgil had no idea how Roman was doing but he could only hope that he was as good at this as he said he was.

Virgil approached the nest of the dragon carefully, checking and double-checking for any stray dragon eggs or something. Something crunched under his foot and Virgil froze like a dear in headlights. He looked down and stifled a shriek with a hand over his mouth.

There was a bare animal skull in the nest. It looked like it belonged to a cow or something. Before Virgil could throw up, he moved on and away, resolving to never look down again.

Right in the middle of the nest of horrors, hovering at around eye level, was a Sparklier Than Average rock. It was blue, like Logan, but sometimes it shifted into blue like Patton.

Rolling his eyes at the wannabe space stone, Virgil plucked it out of mid-air, and held it tightly in his hand while making his way out of the nest.

A scream shattered the air, higher in pitch than the dragon’s and so full of pain that Virgil’s heart clenched. 

“Oh shit,” he hissed, sprinting around the stupid lava pool. He couldn’t see the battle from here; the glow from the lava obscured everything. Sweat ran down his face as he ran. Another scream rang through the cave, echoing a thousand times.

Virgil’s eyes grew ten sizes when he arrived at the scene. The dragon, huge and _angry,_ was holding Roman at the throat. He was suspended in the air, and struggling weakly, sword nowhere in sight. Breathing quickening, Virgil could make out the blood that caked his hair and clothes.

_Oh god oh god oh god oh god ohgodohgodohgodohgodohgodohgodohgod-_

His grip on the stone tightened, and that was when Virgil was struck with an idea.

“Hey! Hey, Ugly!” he yelled, waving the rock in the air madly. The dragon paused in strangling Roman and regarded him. Virgil shivered as he looked directly into its eyes, a depthless black. “You want the rock?! Do you want it?!” It dropped Roman in response. Virgil’s stomach rolled Roman’s impact with the ground made a _crack_. _“Come at me you scaly bitch!”_ he screeched.

It finally got the damn message, and started lumbering toward him, murder in its eyes. Virgil’s ‘flight’ reflex kicked in, and he was running as fast as he could, away from Roman and to the lava, all the while holding the rock up in the air.

Of course, the lava was too hot for him to go right up to the edge, but he was close enough. Sparing one more look toward the dragon, Virgil let out a war cry as he threw the rock into the magma before throwing himself at the ground, out of the rampaging dragon’s way. He registered pain in his arm somewhere, before adrenaline took over completely.

He sprinted to Roman’s side, desperately shaking his shoulders. Heat barrelled into him, and he barely ducked out of the way as a column of fire shot out and hit the wall in front of him. He didn’t get out of the way completely, as a flame licked his shoulder. He cried out, trembling in pain. Oh god, he just wanted to get out and _sleep._  

“Hey! Hey, Princey!” Something exploded, and Virgil squeaked, instinctively covering Roman’s body with his own. Heat blasted the two of them, flooding his airways and suffocating him for one, terrifying second. Most of the heat disappeared immediately, so Virgil looked up briefly and caught sight of the dragon’s body, charred beyond recognition, and the scorch marks on the floor and ceiling around the pit.

“Roman, if we die, I’m gonna kill you,” he muttered, awkwardly sitting him up. He’s looked _bad,_ with a black eye, bruises beginning to form around his throat, three, bleeding slashes on his chest like claws marks and his arm bent at an inhumane angle. Virgil strained as he lifted him up to his feet. Now that they were so close, Virgil could hear him wheezing for breath. Roman was half leaning on Virgil, half being carried, and they began to make their way out of the stupid cave, Roman making a little sound of pain with every other step.

And then the universe decided the make the situation worse with falling rocks.

From boulders to pebbles to the little sparkly ones they found in the walls earlier. Rocks were falling on them and making everything more difficult. Virgil’s skin burned where the smaller ones made contact and he felt his anxiety skyrocket, and tears make their way into his eyes as his breathing spiralled out of control. _I am worthless, we’re gonna die now, it’s my fault-_

**_No._ **

He wiped them away. They just needed to get out of this cave and they would be safe. The forest is safety. Safety, until Patton or Logan came to find them.

He matched his footsteps with his breathing, deliberate and easy. Roman let out a weak moan next to him and slid further down in his grip. The ground shuddered as a boulder the size of a person fell a few meters away from where they were standing. Too close for comfort.

“C’mon Roman. Don’t do this to me now,” he murmured. He wasn’t expecting a reply, though.

“Virge. I’m-I’m scared,” he whispered. Virgil quickened his pace, heart pounding in his chest.

“Hey! You’re gonna be fine, okay?” he breathed back. They were hurrying through the entrance tunnel. Virgil sucked in a breath when something large hit his injured shoulder, sending sharp pain shooting through his arm. In a moment of desperation, Virgil shook off his jacket and covered Roman’s head with it. He was almost completely lax in his arms, and Virgil was struggling to keep him upright.

“Just a little more, Princey. We’re almost there!”

No response, which sent Virgil spiralling again.

He could see the damn light. He just needed to get there. Safety and security were so _close._ The heat was beginning to lessen, and Virgil nearly sighed in bliss as a cool wind kissed his face. With the last of his strength, he stumbled to the exit and shoved Roman as far away from it as he could. Roman landed in a heap a few feet away. Just as Virgil was going to follow him, one of the fucking rocks hit his head, which made a resonating _crack._

His head exploded in pain as tears blurred his vision and he wobbled dangerously as he ran forward a few steps before falling right next to Roman and curling up, shivering due to the sudden temperature shift.

“I hate you, you stupid prick,” he mumbled as he drifted off. _A nap sounds great right about now._

 

“Out of all the irresponsible, _stupid things_ -,“

“I don’t think we can move them Logan. We’ll have to sink down.”

Virgil was jolted out of unconsciousness by two voices, one almost yelling, the other whispering in concern.

As he opened his eyes, the world went from black to green.

“Lo, he’s waking up!”

There were hands on him, Virgil realised, stroking his hair and flitting over his injuries. “Be careful Patton.” Another hand, much cooler than the first, traces the pain on his head. “Hold still Virgil. This will take one second.”

Sinking out made Virgil’s stomach drop and his head spin. He closed his eyes against it, stomach twisting unpleasantly.

Before the pain could fully settle in, he passed out again.

 

The next time Virgil came to, was hours later, in the Mindscape commons. He registered soft fleece instead of grass, and warmth as well. Not the suffocating heat of the cave, but nice, safe warmth. And he could smell something _delicious._

Surprisingly, Virgil found himself in no pain. Odd, considering what had just happened. Or maybe he’d been in a coma…

Virgil flinched when a face appeared, hovering above him. He squinted a little. It didn’t look like Logan or Patton, and he doubted Roman would even be able to walk.

“Hey Virge,” Thomas murmured. Huh. A small part of his mind wondered why Thomas, of all people was here, but he appreciated the comforting weight of his hand on Virgil’s cheek. “Fair warning, I’m gonna yell for someone, okay?” Virgil just rolled his eyes at him. Thomas grinned a little. “There’s my anxiety. Patton! Virgil’s awake!”

“Oh thank god!” Patton practically ran into the room, wiping his hands on his apron hurriedly and knelt at Virgil’s side. “Never do that again, okay?” There were tears in his eyes. “Roman means well, you know, but dear god, _please_ don’t go off and fight a dragon without telling us first!” He pressed his lips against Virgil’s forehead, and Virgil sighed a little.

“Give him some space Patton.” Oh boy. Here came the lecture. Logan frowned as he gave Virgil a quick look over. Virgil could’ve sworn Logan’s eyes held promise of murder. “I expect he’d be rather drained, considering his, ah, _prior activities.”_

He should probably warn Roman about the lecture coming his way, but Roman was the one who got them into this mess, so it evened out.

“Logan.” A warning edge had crept into Thomas’s voice.

Logan set about, bending and poking at Virgil, completely ignoring Thomas. “Tell me if anything hurts,” he instructed. Logan lifted a bandaged arm and prodded at a spot on his upper arm, where he could see a spot of blood that had seeped through. He didn’t feel anything though. Logan’s eye’s lit up momentarily. “Hm. Good. The burn will take longer to heal. Keep the bandages clean. They’ll be fine within the week.”

“M’kay.”

Logan then proceeded to surprise him by brushing hair out of Virgil’s eyes. “Please resist the urge to challenge a fire-breathing dragon in the future, yes?”

“Alright, Lo.”

 

Something crashed in the next room over, which made Virgil jolt awake.

“Fuck!”

Virgil winced a little at the proclamation. Silently, he slipped off the couch and padded to the source of the noise. He didn’t expect to see Roman standing in the middle of the kitchen, dejectedly looking at the toaster, which was now on the floor.

“What in the fresh, ever-loving _hell_ are you doing, Princey,” he hissed. Roman looked up and only now could Virgil see the look in his eyes. The look that had goaded him into the stupid adventure. That look only took second after Patton’s Puppy Eyes.

He pointed at the toaster with the arm that wasn’t in a cast. The movement caused his shirt to shift a little, so that Virgil could see bandages peeking through. “I was trying to use the toaster.”

“Why?”

“Because I want to summon Satan- _because I want toast you idiotic Emo Nightmare,”_ Roman snarled back. Right. How could Virgil forget. Princey got grumpy without his nom-noms.

“You could’ve asked for help,” Virgil growled. “You broke your goddamn arm Princey, go _sit the fuck down!”_

There was no argument in his tone, and Roman knew it. Muttering obscenities under his breath, he sat down heavily on the stool next to the counter. Silently, Virgil got about, and started making toast.

“Crofter’s or peanut butter?”

“Peanut butter, please.” Ah, so the Prince remembered his manners. Virgil smirked a little. He slid the plate over to Roman, who picked up a slice and began to eat. Virgil decided on grabbing a muesli bar from the cupboard. Silence filled the air between them. It was a wonder they hadn’t woken Patton or Logan up.

The silence nearly became uncomfortable before Roman spoke up. “I’m sorry, Virgil,” he mumbled. Virgil blinked in confusion. “Oh, don’t give me that look! I dragged you out there! You were uncomfortable with the situation and then we both got hurt and if it weren’t for you we’d both be regenerating and oh _god,_ how could I do that to you or Patton or Logan or Thomas! I’m supposed to _protect_ you guys, and I went off to do the most unprincely thing imaginable-“

“Pump the brakes, Princey,” Virgil soothed, reaching over the counter and placing a hand on Roman’s shoulder. “Take some deep breaths, kay?” Roman nodded, gripping the counter with his good hand. Virgil moved around the counter so that he was behind Roman and rubbed his back in what he hoped was a reassuring fashion. “I’m not mad at you Princey, and you’re a fucking idiot for thinking I’d hate you.”

“Didn’t say that,” Roman mumbled.

“It was implied. You cool now?” God, he wished Patton were here. He was much better at helping people out.

“Yeah. Thanks.”

 

Logan rolled his eyes in affection. “I believe this is a violation of privacy, Patton.” They were situated at the top of the stairs, listening to the conversation in the kitchen.

 _“Shush Logan!”_ Patton hissed frantically. “They’ll hear us!”

 

“Alright Roman. How exactly did you manage to provoke a fully-grown dragon?”

“He poked it with a stick.”

“It wasn’t a _stick,_ Virgil! It was a sword!”

“It did about as much good as a stick would’ve!”

“Oh. Oh _dear!”_

“We’re in trouble, aren’t we?”

_“Come on Princey!”_

_“ROMAN CREATIVITY SANDERS! ARE YOU TELLING ME THAT YOU PURPOSELY POKED A DRAGON WITH A SWORD TO ANGER IT?!”_

“Do you two have any idea how _worried_ we were?”

“DON’T THINK YOU’RE GETTING OUT OF THIS ONE VIRGIL! WHY DID YOU THINK TO _CONTINUE_ THE QUEST WHILE INJURED?”

“ _Oh shit.”_

“Run, Virge!”

“I _AM_ RUNNING YOU DRAMATIC ASS BITCH, LOOK WHAT YOU’VE DONE!” 

 


End file.
